LOS ANGELES – This week, the top ten couples are telling the story of the most memorable year of their lives through dance. I only hope it means Len is not wearing his cranky pants and can celebrate these couples - not because I want Len to be happy, but because I am afraid Bruno will stand up and move in a way that makes me scream, "HEY! THIS IS A FAMILY SHOW!" Now, let's get to the dancing!
PHOTOS:
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Couple: Rob & Cheryl
Dance: Fox Trot
Rob chose 2003, the year his father passed. He also chose his father's favorite song. I have to say, I don't feel sad watching this. I felt happy and a bit surprised - Rob is actually not a bad dancer. He didn't look like he missed a step. Awwww. I liked this!
Len said Rob "put the 'dash' into Kardashian." He said Rob's footwork and posture was good. He said Rob's dad should be looking down telling him he did good. Bruno said Rob had a bit of Brando and Sinatra. He said it reminded him of Guys and Dolls and Rob had no idea what that was. Carrie Ann said Rob makes progress each week. She said it was smooth.
SCORE: 24
Couple: Chynna & Tony
Dance: Rumba
Chynna chose 1990, the year Wilson Phillips released "Hold On." She said she gets emotional when she hears the song because it reminds her of kicking booze and drugs. Interesting. I think of the movie Bridesmaids . I wanted to like this, but I felt like it was more posing than dancing. Also, Chynna looked a little rushed through some of the steps. But when she held a move, it was nice. I'm just "meh" on this one.
Bruno said Chynna is a smoldering siren. He said she was expressive and had beautiful lines. Carrie Ann said Chynna is stunning to watch. She said "it's like butter." Len said if Chynna keeps dancing like that, she's going to be around for weeks. He said it was fantastic.
SCORE: 26 (The first 9s of the season from Len and Bruno)
Couple: Chaz & Lacey
Dance: Rumba
Chaz chose this year because he's the happiest he's ever been. He also chose a song his dad wrote - "Laugh At Me." Oh, Chaz is taking off a furry vest before dancing. Not sure what that has to do with anything. Chaz is moving as if his knees aren't troubling him like they were last week. It's also possible Lacey is doing most of the dancing here. Definite improvement from last week, but not my favorite rumba.
Carrie Ann said she's impressed by Chaz's courage just showing up. She said it wasn't Chaz's best performance. She didn't think Chaz danced enough. Len said that was Chaz's best dance. He said dancing doesn't come easy to Chaz, but each week he gives his all. Tom asked what he did with the real Len. Bruno said there's an endearing quality about Chaz. He said Chaz looked a little bit lost. Then, Bruno was trying to show that the rumba comes from the back, then he got all crazy arms.
SCORE: 18
Couple: Kristin & Mark
Dance: Samba
Kristin chose 2005, when she moved to LA and chose to pursue a career in entertainment. I don't want to hear one judge say this isn't hippy enough. This girl's hips don't lie. And props to the wardrobe department for keeping Kristin in her costume.
Len said the Beyoncé stuff wasn't his cup of tea. He was booed, then told the audience "talk to the hand." He said he thought the other 80% of the dance was fabulous. Bruno said it was "crazy in lust." He told her to keep going that way. Unless one of you tells me otherwise, I think the guy the camera kept cutting to was Kristin's ex-fiance. Carrie Ann told Kristin to keep it up.
SCORE: 24
Couple: Carson & Anna
Dance: Tango
Carson chose 2003, the year Queer Eye For The Straight Guy came out. Oh, starting this one by storming down a red runway - then a complete costume switcheroo within seconds? What is happening! Bless Carson's heart! He's trying so hard, but this is just campy. And his kicks look more like they were pulled from A Chorus Line than tango. It was still fun.
Bruno said it was "insanely brilliant." That got him a kiss from Carson. Then, Bruno started shouting - I honestly have no idea what he said and I had the luxury of rewinding this a few times. Carrie Ann said she loves Carson and said the dance had technique. Len said Carson "put the boy in flamboyant." He said the tango had merit.
SCORE: 23
Couple: JR & Karina
Dance: Rumba
JR's memorable year was when his Humvee hit a landmine. JR talking about being depressed - man, that's the first time I think I've seen him not be positive. His dance is a tribute to the men and women who didn't make it home. And I'm crying before the music has even started. From what I can see through my watery eyes, JR is crushing this dance. Have we talked about his partnering? Because JR is right there for Karina - and this did not look like the easier choreography seen in some of the other rumbas. Wow. Just - wow.
JR had a moment - tears as the audience gave him one long, deserved standing ovation. Carrie Ann was crying. She said, "Heroes are ordinary people who do extraordinary things. You did something extraordinary." She thanked JR for "one of the most profound, honest dances I've ever seen." Len said JR could have been more musical through the arms, but he said it was a wonderful performance. Bruno said JR is a source of inspiration. He was impressed by JR.
SCORE: 26
Couple: Nancy & Tristan
Dance: Waltz
Nancy's moment was the premature birth of her babies - a little girl who almost died (and Nancy says she almost died before the babies were delivered). I must have gone soft, because I'm starting to like Nancy. Maybe it's because she's not suited up and yelling about some court case, but she looks sweet. And she seems to glide across the stage like she's been happily doing this for years. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Len said Nancy has to work on her posture, but he thought she showed the emotion of the dance. Bruno said Nancy was soft and dreamy. He agreed with Len. Carrie Ann was lost in a fantasy watching Nancy.
SCORE: 21
Couple: Ricki & Derek
Dance: Rumba
Ricki chose last year. She was divorced. Her house burned down. She met the man she's going to marry. Ricki looks great - except for that crimped hair. Derek has given Ricki some tough choreography, but she doesn't seem to be stumbling through this. I liked this one!
Bruno said "every step was as expressive as a word in a poem." He said it was "the actress-dancer at her best." Carrie Ann said "Ricki Lake is on fire!!!" She said the dance was fantastic. Len congratulated Derek on a great routine and congratulated Ricki for a great performance.
SCORE: 27
Couple: Hope & Maks
Dance: Cha Cha Cha
Hope chose this year because of the World Cup. She talked about things not going your way. Oh - the hairdresser with the crimper got Hope, too! Also, I think she's wearing one of Madonna's rejected costumes from the 80s. I'm sad. I really thought Hope was going to crush this show. But this was not awesome. It was kind of fun. It did not make me want to jump off my sofa and dance. Hope was almost stomping around like a dude. Not sexy.
Carrie Ann said Hope is a strong dancer, but she wants Hope to work on her walk. Len said he thought the costume and part of the routine were provocative, but he thought the actual cha cha cha was good. He thought it was Hope's best dance so far. Bruno said, "The sexy minx is out of the cage." He said Hope needs to learn how to walk sexy.
SCORE: 24
Couple: David & Kym
Dance: Rumba
I almost forgot about David! He chose this last year to tell his story: his marriage fell apart, he turned to alcohol and now he's taken a positive turn. So, another rumba, huh? I don't envy David having to do this dance after some other couples have done so well with it. Oh, open shirt. David may be the first star to give this a shot this season. I kind of liked this. So, either I'm getting sleepy and have been worn down, or David is getting good at this dancing thing.
Len said it was a mix of emotion and motion. He said it was well done. Bruno said David was romantic. He said David did a wonderful job. Carrie Ann said David brought so much more of himself to the floor. She said it was magical.
SCORE: 24
Tuesday night, Mary J. Blige will perform as will Estelle. Len is also expected to dance! Also, one couple is going home (eyes on you, Chaz and Nancy). You can watch the show online here. You can see the music used in the show here.